Glad I finally get to move into my new place next week. My current landlord, a.k.a. guy who bought the apartments and is turning them into condos, is proving himself to be a turd wrapped in skin (gee, surprise!) It’s getting pretty f’in cold out now and dude hasn’t turned the heat on yet. It’s obvious that it should be on, as we’ve all called, and *ahem*, asked him nicely, but it seems that our requests are “slipping his mind”. Arg. My cat Frank is sneezing every so often now and that makes me sorta mad. I took a shower this morning and the water (which would be considered “warm” under normal, comfy room-temperature conditions) felt like it was burning my back and bum. It made the bathroom fog up something serious, too. You’d think you were in a dark street in London if you didn’t know any better. Please. Turn. Heat. On.
Anywho, I put the oven on BROIL this morning for 20 minutes to get some heat going in this place for us. It worked dandy. Frank likes to be held, so I spent the first few minutes near the oven with him. He was diggin’ the warm breeze, purring so intensely that I could have easily used him as a back massager.
I haven’t been to the grocery store lately because heck, I figure I’m moving next week anyhow, so why bother getting a bunch of foods that I’m going to have to bag up and move, you know?
Guess that’s making me sort of hungry though, the whole not having much food on hand thing. As I was standing near the oven holding Frank, I 
started seeing him in a different way. A cartoon bubble appeared over my head of him in roasting pan with an apple in his mouth.. hm.. I began to think “You know, I could slice up some carrots and potatoes, throw a secret blend of herbs and spices in there..”
Yeah, I had better go get some real food before I get any more ideas like that. Frank’s pretty cool, I’d hate to have to eat him and all just out of my own sheer laziness.
Sorry about that, lil’ buddy. Dad’s not going to eat you.
Slumlord. The cat back massager- I have one of those! John gets really annoyed because she purrs so damned loud at night and had even asked one time, "Could you turn her down or something?"
Haha! That's not a bad idea – you should take your cat into Radio Shack and have a volume knob installed on her side.
BTW, people: if you like my blawg, check out debbiecakes' handiwork ("smile if you're lying" in my list o links) – it's immensely entertaining. Fer real. Not to mention she lives in the same city as my brother, which instantly makes her cool by default.