Upon recent absorption of Christmas music via local radio stations, I have come to the conclusion that any Christmas song recorded after 1977 (the year Bowie and Bing Crosby rocked out together in “Peace on Earth” to the delight of television audiences across the nation), is completely unnecessary. Ludicrous. Painful. Well, maybe I can let a Harry Connick Jr. recording or two slip by… but I just heard Rod Stewart and Dolly Parton sing “Baby it’s Cold Outside” and nearly regurgitated eggnog through my nostrils. Even the newer Johnny Mathis Christmas recordings are digital, dull, and lifeless – and he’s one of the ambassadors of the golden age of recorded Christmas music.
We need to gather every single piece of Mariah Carey, Trans Siberian Orchestra, Mannheim Steamroller, Amy Grant, Rod Stewart, Gloria Estefan, Kenny G., etc, musical Christmas renderings out there, especially in radio station archives, and have a cd smashing party.
Everyone with me? There is a great abundance of this feces disguised as holiday music out there, so we need to get an early start on gathering it in order to make next Christmas safe to turn on the radio again.
I’ll get a hold of everyone in the spring.
Next year instead of turning your radio on and letting Clear Channel turn your brain into a mushy programmed holiday music robot, check these CDs out:
