Those of you that know me are well aware that I have very little shame and do not embarrass very easily. Matter of fact I can’t remember the last time I was embarrassed. What year is it? No.. Seriously, don’t remember. Was prolly when I wasn’t paying attention and accidentally walked into the ladies room in the Robert Street Mac-Donalds 4-5 years ago to a little girl warshing her hands looking at me like I was going to eat her (this was when I had hair down past my waistline and was extra scary looking!) Alls I wanted was to rinse the eggnog shake residuals off of my hands and suddenly there I was right in the middle of the makings of an evening news story.
Alas, I usually just don’t care about silly shit and laugh it off.. And then there was tonight. My several year-long streak was finally broken.
Was on the phone with Tam-bourine yammering away and she started dozing off a lil’, cause she works hard during the day helping dogs with yella skin and whatnot. That tends to take it out of a person, so I hear. I told her she best get some shut-eye because sleep is the best medicine, even if you’re not sick. I bid her a proper farewell and she mustered up a few words in half asleep zombie slo-mo style to acknowledge that yes, it was bed time. I chuckled, hung up the phone, put it on my desk and went to check my email.
When I went to move my mouse, it scrolled over one of those irritating MySpace flash animation advertising banners that makes sound when moused over. This particular one had smiley faces on it and they were sassy as all hell. My speaker volume was up pretty high, and one of the faces angrily yelled “SAY SOMETHING!” to which another sheepishly replied “Whaaaat?”
Now here’s the part where I lost it and crapped my drawers: I looked at my phone and realized I had not hung up; I had pressed the speakerphone button instead. So half asleep on the other end not having hung up yet, she heard a pissed off sounding “SAY SOMETHING!”…“Whaaat?” Panicking, I hung up hoping against hope that she’d dozed off and not heard a lick of that. Homey don’t speak to people like that, raising my voice and sounding irate is simply not my style. I fell deep into a thought spiral and figured it prolly sounded as if I was pissed off yelling “SAY SOMETHING!” into the air ’cause she was dozing off. I don’t like coming off as rude to nobody, especially when I never even made a peep such as in this case.
Seconds later, I regrouped and hit redial to check in with her and assess the damage. She was laughing her arse off and that was very relieving, and once I explained what went down, was laughing even more. *whew* Bullet dodged.
That’s the sort of bizarre timing mishap you usually only see on Threes Company when Mr. Furley overhears something and misinterprets it, his eyes bug out, and wackiness ensues.
Like a sitcom, it was all resolved and peace was restored when all was said and done. Lesson learned: I’m making sure my PC is on mute and my phone is good and fuckin’ folded in half from here on out before ending a conversation and checking email.