Today my Mom turns.. um.. I don’t know? Good job, Mom! You’re the best mother I’ve ever had, and not only am I incredibly thankful that you rule so much and you’re such great phone support when I have a cooking question, but I’m also incredibly thankful that you had such awesome kids.

I ponder what my Mom’s pre-husband and kids life must have been like when her birthday rolls around, and it’s really bizarre for me to imagine. It’s hard to believe that my Mom was freshly born at one time and was not housebroken. At one time in her life, my Mom weighed less than a sack of pataytas and my Grandma was wiping her poopie butt and changing her diapers. I have pictures to prove that she was once that small; but still it’s fooking strange to think about my Mom being younger than me.

I remember Mum was driving me around running errands when I was a youngen. I asked her how old she was, and she said 32. I’m 32+1 right now, and I get the heebie jeebies when I think that I’m as old as my Mum was when I asked her that question. She already had gotten married and had kids long before that, and damn.. that’s just weird. Kind of like when I was 27 and got a copy of my person receipt (a.k.a. birth certificate) – it said that my Dad was 27 when I was born. (insert Twilight Zone music here)

At any rate, as anyone who has met the lady knows, my Mom toadilly rules. If there were a Best Mom In The World contest, she would win, hands down. You think your Mom is cool? Nah-ah. Outside of her Mom, my Dad’s Mom, the Mom of my nephews and niece, and my future Other Mom, all other Moms suck eggs. Lela’s Mom is pretty awesome too now that I think about it, so I’ll give her Mom immunity as well.

Let’s just hope that the less fortunate egg sucking moms are sucking on my Mom’s homemade deviled eggs. It will give them an idea of how they should taste next time they try to make ’em.

Enjoy your day of birth, Mom!