Once upon a time way back in 1993, I got to meet my numero uno rock and roll heroes KISS at the Sam Goody store in the Mall of America, and it was pretty darn awesome – mainly because up until that point they didn’t seem human to me. I had about 15 (not 20 as my transcript indicates) years of KISS worship under my belt, and not once did I ever expect an in-person KISS appearance and autograph sesh to ever happen in Minnesota. Thank you, then-new Mall of America, for attracting such prestigious rock celebs. Joe Satriani also did a Sam Goody signing that month which I went to but quickly learned that I had the wrong date – it happened the day before I thought it did. Bummer. He remains on my guitar hero meet-n-greet bucket list to this day.
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I was working 3rd shift at Target at the time, so when KISS signing day came, as soon as I got off of work in the morning I cruised over to the MegaMall where I met me goilfriend and brother who stood in line with me (thanks, Chuck, for not only standing in line, but giving me YOUR autographed promo shot of the band!) We waited either 7 or 10 hours – it’s hard to tell because I mention both durations in my notebook. I’m guessing it was more 7, but still – that’s a long time to hang out waiting in line on the upper level of the mall, especially after working all night. But at that point in my life, KISS was bulletproof and could do no wrong, especially having released REVENGE the year before. They kind of lost me in the mid-late 80s but that album was a rock-solid return to the KISS form that I once knew and loved. I mean, when you go from this:
To this:
Uh.. yeah. You can go ahead and keep the first one. I’ll take multiple servings of the second one, please. That guitar solo is fucking gnarly, dude! As soon as I saw the latter on MTV I was a born-again KISStian. (There’s a new term for you to use in interviews, Paul & Gene.)
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The July 8 Mall of America appearance was to pimp the release of their ALIVE III album which was a hot-rockin’ document of their REVENGE tour the year before. I went to the show in St. Paul and it ruled. KISS was finally back, out to kill, stripped of any nonsense, and better than ever.
The only evidence I’ve been able to find on the internet of this historic Sam Goody event is here. I kinda wish I was in the background of those photos, although at the same time I’m very happy that I’m not. I’m pretty sure I remember what I wore that day and I’m glad that it wasn’t documented, at least not in that batch of photos.
As soon as I got home that day I opened up my notebook and wrote everything down before I forgot any of the details. Welcome to blogging circa July 1993, kids:
(Click for full size)
And there you have it. A few clarifications I need to make:
- I told Paul Stanley “I’ve worshipped you since I was child” – not “a child” – it was definitely a Chris Farley Gawd I’m so STUPID! moment, but hey. I was on the cusp of turning 20, tired, tounge-tied, and meeting my rock and roll heroes for the first time… so I’ll cut myself some slack. Nice job trying to cover it up in the transcript though, Me.
- Gene Simmons is not the greatest songwriter to ever set foot on the planet. Ah to be 19 and of the mindset that Gene Simmons could do no wrong. I’m sure that his morbidly obese ego enjoyed that little massage.
- By “politician handshake” I meant the kind where you shake a person’s hand with both of your hands. This was far too big of an occasion to give them my usual one-handed dead fish treatment.
As far as telling Eric (Singer – drummer who now plays fake Peter Criss in the current incarnation of the band) that he was doing a great job, he was the new guy at the time. He’s a killer rock drummer and was the perfect guy for the job so I just wanted to give him a little love. And as far as Bruce Kulick is concerned, I’d probably say the same ridiculous shit to him today. The guy can play rock guitar solos like a mofo, is really nice, and he had a pretty big impact on me as KISS’s lead guitarist when I was a pudgy teeny bopper starting out playing guitar and watching him wail away on the KISS Animalize Live Uncensored VHS concert.
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That was the last time I met any of those particular guys, and I’m fine if I never meet them again, although I guess it would be cool to meet Bruce again if the planets ever align. It was the perfect time to do meet them – they were kickin’ arse and taking names, and then came the reunion tour and makeup. That was fun but quickly turned into a mess. I jumped off of the wagon in the early 2000s and haven’t really paid much attention to modern-day KISS since. Not interested. There’s 25+ years of solid material before that for me to fondly look back on and draw from, and I often do.
Here’s the autographed 8×10. ROCK AND EFFING ROLL
