This may sound a might bit nastaay, but oh well. It’s as much of my choice to write it as it is yours to read it, correct?!
I have a wee mole on my inner right arm that has been sprouting 2 hairs ever since I can remember. My Great Aunt June always referred to moles as “Angel Kisses”. I muss say if being kissed by an angel leaves a brown dot on your skin that grows hair, no thanks, angels. Kiss somebody else, please (unless you’re a very attractive angel).
Anyways.
I yank the teeny hairs out, forget about my fertile little mole, and a month or so later there are those two fuggin’ hairs again. It’s hardly noticeable unless I were to walk up to you exposing my inner arm and pointing it out yelling “SEE MY TWO WEE MOLE HAIRS? SEE ‘EM?” It’s just one of those little things in life that annoys me. Sort of like when I see a plate of brownies and then discover that there’s nuts on ‘em.
I don’t mind dots on my arms like this, but if they’re of the hair sprouting variety, it makes me feel like I’m turning into a cactus… or like a spider is trying to ex-scape from me or something.
Today a man with thinning hair walked past me as I was observing the aforementioned mole hairs which are just about at the pullout point, and something dawned on me: I believe I’ve found an answer to baldness. Remove moles such as these from those who don’t want them and have them grafted onto the scalps of willing and able victims suffering from blurry hair or complete lack of hair altogether. Because if someone’s living with the daily challenge of follicle retention of the scalp, and people like me have issues with follicles growing back no matter how many times they’re yanked, do tha math and you’ll see yourself that this makes perfect sense. Not to mention if the grafted moles for whatever reason stop producing hair, you’d still be left with a healthy looking solid brown scalp.
I will volunteer to be a guinea pig to test this out on if anyone knows any good plastic surgeons, although I’ll prollee have it grafted onto my left pinky toe, as I already have a full head of hair. This would be totally awesome, because I’d simultaneously 1) get rid of my mole, as well as 2) finally have hair on my left pinky toe like I’ve always wanted.