12:59PM
It’s a little too frigid out even for this MN native’s liking, so today I’m going to stay inside and imagine one of my walk breaks from work that I fancy taking ever so much.
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I’m putting my coat on and looking at my phone as I head for the door hoping I look too preoccupied to interrupt.
This is the part where I walk down 7 flights of stairs in the back stairwell and look at somebody’s NUTS drawings on the wall. There are 3 of them. They all look like this:
Actual nuts artwork courtesy of 4th floor stairwell in my work building
Now I’m going outside and see the Brooklyn Bridge to my right and start walking toward it. There’s usually a construction truck backing up that I have to stand and wait for. It’s backing into an area under the bridge full of those temporary construction office trailers. I’m assuming one is backing up now. BEEP BEEP BEEP. As I’m waiting for that a Q train passes above and I start to get irritated because I can’t hear one of the two podcasts that I religiously listen to. Just as I bust my phone out and finish rewinding the podcast 30 seconds to try and catch up on what I missed a Q train coming from the other direction passes overhead.
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I’m on Plymouth under scaffolding across from the old building that’s constantly under construction. I’m guessing it’s going to be condos. Condos, they’re everywhere. Condos and frozen yogurt shops. Oh, look. A giant sand-colored dog shit smear on the sidewalk. And I almost stepped in it! Wow, that’s a big dog poop smear on such an otherwise clean sidewalk. I wonder who stepped in it? Most likely not the owner… the owner was probably ahead of the dog and certainly noticed as the dog was dispensing. That definitely looks like a construction boot print. He probably didn’t even notice or care.
Check that surf clothing store out. It’s in the middle of nowhere. I wonder who shops there. I wonder who even knows it’s there besides me?
I think it’s time to dial up Gene Loves Jezebel’s Jealous on my phone and crank it. Man I love that song at random times like this. I’d probably go for Dada’s Dizz Knee Land after it but that’s not on my phone for some reason and I keep forgetting to put it on there.
Aah. There we go.
Taking a left on Washington street now. I would like to go into Peas & Pickles to walk past the creepy lunch buffet and look at the big steaming silver bin of peeled eggs. I always want to take a picture of those eggs but hovering lunch eaters always ruin the composition. I keep on moving to go back and look at their beer selection. I never buy anything but like to look just to see if anything different is there. This is just a quick palate cleansing walk I’m taking here, there isn’t much time for peeled egg watching or looking at beer that I’m never going to buy. So I won’t go into Peas & Pickles for now. Maybe I’ll drop in around 3 for a little container of chickpea salad. Only if the red onions aren’t cut too coarse.
Up I go toward the park on Cadman with the Brooklyn War Memorial in it. I’m on Washington & Prospect now and there’s the 3 giant fish head sculptures popping out of the ground. Much like the silver bin of peeled eggs I always think about taking a picture every time I pass the fish heads but I don’t. This time is no exception. I have a feeling the fish heads will be gone some day and I’ll regret not taking a picture of them. They weren’t there a few months ago. Hm. At least I know the eggs will always be at Peas & Pickles. Maybe I’ll take a picture of those fish heads next time, though. When I’m not on a fake walk. Taking a picture on a fake walk is sort of a hard thing to do.
I’m turning left. It’s time to get back to camp. If I’m gone any longer somebody is bound to notice. I’m walking past the big Watchtower building that I always see the top of when I’m in a cab on the way to the airport (not the kind of watchtower you’re probably thinking of. It’s the Jehova’s Witnesses kind of Watchtower). I wonder who or what is inside of it. It is a huge, clean building yet I never see anyone go in our out. Perhaps every single annoying toilet paper-thin Watchtower pamphlet I’ve ever seen is stored in there. They have to store them somewhere.
And now left on Pearl Street. Somebody etched KISS into the sidewalk on the east side of Pearl before it dried. It’s just under the Brooklyn Bridge where the sidewalk starts getting all crooked. I hope whoever did that meant it for the original KISS. Sigh. I don’t feel like going back into work. Maybe I should stop into Jimmy’s and grab a coffee. Nah. I’ll save that for the next virtual break I go on.
Back inside the work building. Hi, stupid elevator.
Floor 7, please. Shit, here come 4 people running to interrupt my straight shot to the 7th floor. And they’re all pressing different floor buttons.
And now the moment where the elevator door closes and everyone feels obligated to take their cell phones out and look at them. And the moment where I refuse to take my cell phone out and look at it. Sadly none of them take notice because they’re too busy trying to find a reason to look at their phones. They’re just mindlessly scribbling their thumbs on the screens because it’s something to do.
And now the floor 7 doors open for me to step back into Planet Work. I’ll see you in a few hours, brain!
